The Puzzle Pieces of Borderline Personality Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a complicated and serious form of mental illness. It is, for many, an enigma. Even though more and more is known about BPD it still seems to puzzle so many people. BPD is mainly caused by the core wound of abandonment which is at the heart of so much of the dysfunctional and even abusive relating of many with BPD. For those on the The Other Side of BPD - the Non Borderline or nonbp the reality of being in a relationship (chosen-partner or unchosen - family) with a borderline is fraught with pain, heartache, and all-too-often being verbally abused, physically abused, emotionally or psychologically abused.
Borderlines - Watch A.J.'s Latest Video - "Wants and Needs in Borderline Personality Disorder" on YouTube
Borderline Personality Disorder is a maze with a seemingly-endless number of layers that encase this most puzzling engima. As someone who has recovered from BPD and who had a borderline father and mother, and as someone who has had an intimate relationship with someone with BPD - I know both sides of this puzzling disorder from the inside out. It is my hope here on this web site and in the ebooks I've written and audio programs I've done that I can enlighten those who seek to increase their awareness and understanding of BPD whether on the borderline side or the non borderline side of this puzzling personality disorder.
© A.J. Mahari January 19, 2007
Jan 21/08 A New Audio Program "Preparing For Recovery From BPD" Parts 1 & 2 by A.J. Mahari
Jan 23/08 A New Audio Program Rage Addiction in BPD by A.J. Mahari (sold separately or packaged with Mahari's Ebook, "Rage and BPD")
The Puzzle Pieces Remain Separate From Each Other Fueling The Enigma of BPD
For those with Borderline Personality Disorder the puzzles pieces of the enigma that is BPD in their lives remain separate. Those with BPD, unless and until they get substantial therapy, live through the borderline false self. A false self that perpetuates this separation from what are essentially the pieces of authentic self lost to the layers and layers of borderline defense mechanisms. Defense mechanisms that once ensured the survival of the borderline but that now have the borderline behind their walls trapped away from the very awareness that is needed to find the light at the end of the tunnel that can mean getting on the road to recovery
Much of what most find puzzling about Borderline Personality can be explained and can be understood. For those who are on the non borderline side what is most puzzling about BPD usually unfolds within the relational contexts where relationships rupture leaving non borderlines puzzled as to the reason for the behaviour of the borderline.
Both the borderline and the non borderline need to bring together the puzzle pieces that still have them mystified in order to find the kind of recovery that means an assimilated understanding of these puzzle pieces that in fact can and will reveal the enigma of Borderline Personality Disorder.
In my Articles, Ebooks, and Audio Programs, it is my hope that I can shed some light on the enigma of BPD that I unravelled in my own journey to recovery from BPD along with the non borderline recovery I went through after ending a relationship with someone with BPD (who also had NPD). As someone who has been there, on both sides of BPD, one thing I think I can say for sure is that I have a profound and clear understanding of the puzzle pieces that make up the enigma of BPD. Personally, I have solved the mystery of the engima of BPD from both sides in my own life. You, whether you are a borderline or non borderline, can do this in your life too. Keep seeking. The search for understanding will yield the awareness you need and that you seek when you are ready to be open to it. Being open to this awareness does mean being open to your pain and available to grieve that pain in healthy ways.
© A.J. Mahari January 18, 2008 - All rights reserved.
What Are The Puzzle Pieces of BPD?
Put simply, without complex explanation, the puzzle pieces of Borderline Personality Disorder are the remnants of the lost authentic self. They are housed within the fragmented egos of those with BPD. These shattered pieces of the lost authentic self that remain deeply buried under the abandonment pain and abandonment trauma of what I call the core wound of abandonment. These shattered pieces of the lost authentic self remain split-off from each other and hidden from the conscious awareness of most with BPD suppressed and tossed aside by the borderline false self in such a way that just fuels the emotional dysregulation and chaos that borderlines suffer profoundly with and from. These puzzle pieces are the unconscious yet ever-present repetition compulsions of those with BPD that are re-experienced in fragmented, dissociative, and compelling ways in the here and now when those with BPD are triggered back to their unresolved abandonment trauma in most, if not all efforts to relate to others.
© A.J. Mahari - Janauary 31, 2008