AJ's Response:
It is difficult to say in any individual way
why they would hate their doctors. However, relationships
of any sort can be very complicated for those diagnosed
with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Lack of
trust and a high degree of both suspiciousness and
defensiveness likely add to the mix where these feelings
are concerned.
Many who are borderline have tremendous difficulty with
authority and authority figures. I suppose there may well
be as many reasons for this as their are borderlines. The
fact is that to many with BPD the doctor, particularly the
psychiatrist they may see represents authority and may be
seen by the borderline has having too much "power". This
perception of another having power, for many borderlines,
will equal their feeling they don't have any power. This
is due to their black and white, all-or-nothing thinking.
Another factor in this may involve the fact that there
are still many out there with BPD who for whatever reason
have not yet been able to grasp that they have to be
responsible for themselves. It is this abdication of
responsibility that leaves borderlines helpless, not the
authority or power of any doctor. Yet many who are not
able to take personal responsibility basically (illogically)
expect the doctor to change them, to make things better,
to give them the "right" pill, to cure them, to end their
pain. No doctor can do this.
Of course another reason borderlines may often express
hatred for their doctors may involve transference and
projection. Often the doctor will take on the role of
a parent or some other significant person in the borderline's
life who did not meet the needs and/or expectations of
the borderline. "Splitting" is a big reason for such
strong feelings. Hate is often a defense as well. It is
a way of distancing and of remaining disconnected as well.
The degree to which hating a doctor is counter-productive
is questionable. Of course it most definitely can be
counter-productive. Sometimes, however, it may be what
is necessary in order for the person with BPD to work
out certain rejection, abandonment, authority, trust issues
etc etc.
The act of truly hating a doctor though is
counter-productive to trying to forge the kind of trusting
relationship that is most conducive to a positive therapy
experience.
Many borderlines are very rigid in their thinking.
I doubt whether you will be able to talk them out of
what it is that they believe they feel for their doctors.
This response is © A.J. Mahari
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This page/section was moved from Soul's Self-Help Central October 13, 2002 and
is © Ms. A.J. Mahari (& Borderlinepersonality.ca (.org) 2000-2007
was last up-dated July 29, 2007
